Hot Yoga Guy

I don’t hate people, I just feel better when they’re not around. — Charles Bukowski

Photo by Ava Sol on Unsplash

I was taking an online yoga class last night in my second bedroom. (Well maybe more like 1/2 bedroom). But I turned it into my little zen escape room with yoga blocks, candles, aromatherapy, and mood-lighting. There’s only room enough for one yoga mat, which is perfect.

I take classes, late at night, when the kids have gone to bed. JK, I am the kid! And I never go to bed.

So, I might as well exercise, or the demons in my head will exercise first.

I was in the middle of wrapping up a nice hot-flow-fusion or whatever around 11:30pm, followed by a 15-minute meditation on gratitude, which must have worked, because suddenly I found myself saying out loud,

“At least I don’t have to worry about hot yoga guy anymore!”

Back when classes were still legal, and I practiced regularly at my local yoga studio, I was always an anxious wreck when hot yoga guy appeared.

I know, usually that’s the dream: a hot yoga guy you practice next to, bat your eyes at during warrior II, flirt with after class by the electrolyte water- cooler, but for a social-phobic, shy yogi, like yours truly, it’s a total nightmare!

Not only was he HOT, but he was also SO nice.

Not only was this guy stunning with his six pack, glowing smile, the whole package, but he then had the gall to wave me down, and start talking to me!

Plus, I never ran into him on my hot days.

It was always when I was down to my last ratty tank-top, had been too lazy for make-up, and thrown my hair into a messy bun when hot guy appeared out of nowhere.

“Hey!” He’d shout across the room, waving me down.

“Oh… hey!” I smiled back, feigning confidence.

(Dammit. He saw me).

Sometimes, if he didn’t see me right away, I’d avoid eye contact the whole class, and then sneak out the back door, running to my car. (An extra three minutes of cardio).

I am pretty sure he wasn’t ever flirting with me. He was just being polite and nice, because some HOT guys are also polite and nice, which is frankly, really annoying!